The Rap Battle Begins

As we get closer and closer to our big "RAPtember" event, the rap battle have already begun. I am asking for your help on this one team, I am asking you to be the judges on this episode of "So you think you can rap". Below is the post of a real live rap battle between two members of the Sixty-Six Sicks, that occured via text message over a several hour span. I am leaving the names annonymous so that we can get an accurate and fair vote. Please hit "comments" under this post to cast your votes or text "Rapper 1" or "Rapper 2" to 208-357-6988 and we will be announcing a winner at RAPtember.

Rapper #1: Sorry for the delay I was out making money, and if it don’t make dollars it don’t make sense, like the last like you just dropped…you call that a comeback? That was a bone dry quote, from here on my rebuttles are coming out of my own throat. And please, I don’t need a search engine, I’m just askin Jeeves when you’re gonna stop pretending, like you know hip and you know your stuff, I’d feel more threatened by Shia Labeouf.

Rapper #2: That was last year Don’t believe everything you hear. Your mom was whispering in my ear, I rule the entire western hemisphere. Even when I’m not near, I’m instilling fear. I kill beats like uethenasia, Got more style than youth of asia.

Rapper #1: That was alright, but I’ve heard better, I’ve got more style than mr Rogers sweater, but even a little better because I don’t make you itch, I make you tremble like my name was Atticus finch, but how would you know sucker you can’t read, but I’ll teach you a lesson & you’ll learn how to bleed.

Rapper #2: I don’t drop my flow all at once, I gradually work you into a corner like a schoolhouse dunce, I cruise like tom and Penelope. Your shaggy hair cant keep up with me, pay attention…my lyrics convinvcing, you just dreaming while I be livin the dream singing hey ho hey ho everybody be screaming go go go.

Rapper #1: You work slowly but I’ll take it all at once, enough with the tickles fool give me a punch, I got more mic skills than that fool wale, your rhymes are so dull I couldn’t sell them on sale. You’re rollin with Tom? Oh aint that cute…I roll like lebron. I take it straight to the hoop. Can’t get a rebound cuz you aint taking no shots, the only way I bounce back is from hittin the top.

Rapper #2: Last I checked lebron got chumped, you can’t even get humped I’m a lyrical surgeon you just a skinny white boy virgin, piggy back your claim to fame oink oink. Your flow stank like dead skank, skunk, bunk, spitting chunks, im a Gemini twins that only know how to fly waving at you bye bye.

Rapper #1: I got flow like a waterfall fat and clear, yours on the otherhand is more like a tear. Once in a while you drop a good spin, but it ends up dry once it reaches the chin. So pick up your game yeah pick up the pace, you’re an arms length away from bein wiped off the face. I’ll blow you in a tissue, you’re hardly an issue, doubt that theres anyone that would even miss you.

Rapper #2: That was beyond lame, you have no game look at your jump shot, you flowing like a malfunctioning robot, you snagging flow from a thesarous, my flow bigga than a rhinocerous. I roam free you scardy cat stuck in a tree, don’t worry I”ll get you down and drag your wannabe game all over town. You mad at me how could you not be, your like Jeremy shockey but I am a GIANT.

Rapper #1: I like how you emphasize with capital letters, even my smallest words speak louder than headers. Headlines deadlines I make it all happen. I have more crunch than a cereal captain. Giants don’t compare because I am colossal, your words are so dry, more so than a fossil. You make shadows, I make an eclipse, if you’re running out of ideas I can give you some tips, give up, lay down, throw in the towel, the crowds are gonna boo youlike they do simon cowell.

Rapper #2: You playing with fire, I’m the man everybody admire, you playing with yourself, can get anybody to play with your self objects in your mirror are bigger than they appear like dragonflies the size of helicopter, you’re the patient and I’m the doctor, itll take a lot to save ya, but I got skills typically they kills, but this time they heals ya, beyond the beyond I listen to your flow and yawned, stick wit me and you got a chance, right now you stuck without pants.

Rapper #1: Haha…that’s so lame it’s making me laugh, I ain’t got no pants because I’m taking a bath! In here relaxin while you’re out there sweating, trying to write rhymes but they’re far from threatening. You’re getting unsteady don’t st st studder, I’m bout to cut through you like a hot knife through butter. Get off the udder, stop milkin so hard, let’s do this like Vegan deal out the cards. I’ll get the ace, and you’ll get the two, by the time I get to three better not see you, or you’ll be seeing me from your back on the ground, I’ll leave you somewhere you will never be found, but not like most under 6 feet of earth, I’ll leave you for the wolves if you step on my turf.

Rapper #2: I don’t do the dishes but I throw away the plates, don’t play safe leave it on the field, don’t think I’ll ever yield, run you down turn that frown upside down, my name Stagge you know me from the you know got more game than anybody you know I throw below the belt, make all the honey honies melt, sign their chest with a pen that’s felt, no matter what I come home to one, that only one, cus that’s a real don juan, please one on and on and on. Anything else is a disgrace, I spit in your face, can’t keep up with my pace peace.

Rapper #1: You use felt pens? I use sharpies, I play with all the girls like they’re just barbies. You say I know you from the you know? The you know what? Oh Stagge the dude that didn’t make the cut? Yeah I remember him what a disgrace, wonder how it feels to end up in last place? But I wouldn’t know because I’m leading the pack, filling the sacks, fillings the seats, taking congrats, taking the heat, coolin off and coming right back, anyone that sees me walkings tippin their hats, anyone that hears me talkin is head bobbin like that, like what like whoa, we needed that rain but chase is makin it snow.

Rapper #2: Leggo my eggo you got a major ego, you can’t even talk the talk, let alone walk the walk, I roll 13 million you can even get it 7 digits, like midgets you small, too small, so small can even claim you work in a mall, when inventory rolls hope you don’t take the fall, results speak louder than words…ya heards, like cattle this aint no rap battle cuz you got smoked, try ta act stoked, just got joked, poked you bloke.

That’s it. Starts with mine ends with yours. May the best man win.